Alliance For Cryoglobulinemia

Alliance For Cryoglobulinemia
You Are RARE But NOT Alone

About Me

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My Maddening Maze began suddenly, when I was just 47, with a plethora of autoimmune diseases. The life I knew changed forever due to chronic debilitating fatigue and pain. Faced with challenges beyond my understanding I began a never ending search for answers. I was later diagnosed in 2010 with a Rare Disease, Cryoglobulinemia Vasculitis. This disease causes my blood to gel in what appears to be temperatures lower than 70 degrees. When this phenomenon happens it can be life threatening causing organ damage, stroke, eye and vision loss along with a host of other complications. Both my kidneys and heart have been attacked by this uninvited guest and each day brings new challenges both physically and mentally. I live to find answers for myself and others that are afflicted with this rare disease and to find joy in living, whatever the cost. My passion and purpose is sharing the voice of the patient lost in the Maze and offering the face of Wellness in spite of it all.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

DIVINE HEALING-DIVINE LIFE.....acceptance of what is!

Where is the Divine in your life? Where is the Divine in mine? How do we picture in our minds eye that which is beyond our understanding? Why is life so difficult even when you follow the rules of life, the understanding of Divine intervention? So hard I have tried to accept what is. It shouldn't be this difficult to be all that is within me. It shouldn't be this difficult to be the I Am, the selfless person that wants only to be one with all. How impossible it feels TODAY to be that soul that sits with the Creator, in complete understanding of acceptance, compassion, unconditional love. WHY? 


As my mind wonders through the thoughts of all my readings, teachings and exposure to what is, I sit and say, "Divine Creator what now?" How do I step into tomorrow without fear, anxiety and worry once again.

Yesterday, I received blood work that was less than acceptable for a clean bill of health. Although the test results say that I am not healed of this disease or even in remission, I believe I AM HEALED.  I was not mentally prepared for the results, considering my body is functioning much better. Even my doctor is confused about the direction we should take, not knowing what to do with this rare disease. The Chemotherapy didn't work. What will tomorrow bring?  I have never been more determined in my life to believe in what I know in my heart feels true.  The Divine has put me on a journey in search for that pure soul that lives within me.  Through sickness and in health I will never stop seeking the truth or stop believing in the healing power of the mind.

When I started this one year journey, I got caught up in the business of my ordinary days. Feeling well, I started slipping into the fires of nonsense. Missing my meditation, not stopping to praise the day and the miracles ready to unfold, I easily slipped into the merry go round of mindlessness.  My body was well yet my mind and soul felt the sorrow and loss of peace. Yesterday was a wake up call again from the forces of this universe. Today I  refocus my thoughts and actions and turn the corner once again seeking healing of both my body and my soul. I offer this day to the Divine knowing I will always be heard. I accept what is and will continue this journey of pure determination knowing the powers of connectedness will continue to guide me each day of my life.

In God I trust,

1 comment:

  1. Namaste my dear sister NaNa. I have searched for unconditional love for three decades my sister. About seven years ago I was asking the very same questions you posit in these your feelings. You are so very close to where you want to be. You have read so many fantastic books and learned from such wonderful people. However, you doubt that you have what it takes to make the final steps. You doubt your ability to truly discover unconditional love and unity. Your cup seems full, because it is.
    You are ready to empty your cup and discover a new reality but you don't know how.

    It was my desire to send a personal e-mail. Alas this is not possible.

    I would be honored to walk these difficult steps with you. My sister NaNa, it is not my desire to teach, as I have nothing to offer. These final steps can only come from within your heart.

    I have been down the road you wish to travel. I dwell in the land you wish to visit. My home is your home, my truth is your truth, NaNa is Christopher, Christopher is NaNa. I invite you to embrace this esoteric gnosis with me.
    I have free long distance and wish to speak with you directly.

    If you wish, my sister, I am your humble servant. Send off your number and a good time to call. Beyond illusion lies the truth of unconditional love and the freedom of unity.

    In Lak' esh, my dear sister NaNa, united we stand searching for true love...


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